When I began blogging many years ago, the basis of my blog was just to update friends and family about the growth of my daughter, Curly. I got married in my 30s and had her in my mid-30’s so it was a big deal – and not just for me. Being able to communicate the life experiences as they came while working full-time and taking CARE of said baby was pretty challenging for me – especially since I was taking online college courses at the time. I heard about blogging through work and decided to jump in and voila! My writing had an outlet and my stories had a forum. As Curly has grown, and Georgie & Little Man came along, there was more to write about. But sometimes telling stories is hard.
As I wrote more posts about my family – about my journey as a wife and mom – and the huge challenges that came along (because LIFE!) I had to learn how to balance privacy and respect with authenticity and openness. I tend to lean toward TOO much information, and had to learn how to cut back on details and soften some sharp points. I also found that people in my life – family members and friends – that I interact with on a daily basis, could become offended by certain revelations and references.
I have had some dark moments. Days where being a mom was the LAST thing I wanted to be. It has been exquisitely painful and I have had to process a lot of things about myself, my expectations, and my reality. And I continue to do so.
I stopped blogging regularly – for quite some time – because I had shared some difficulties my family was experiencing and it stirred up some “stuff” that affected people in my life who have nothing to do with my blog. So I tried to stop blogging about the personal stuff. And then I just stopped blogging. I even got to the point that I wasn’t even journaling in a notebook for fear that someone could stumble upon it “one day” and discover things that might be more fearsome than they could handle. (and little by little, my spirit started to die in the process…)
What I learned is that NOT sharing the stories in some way is missing out on opportunities to connect with people who understand the struggle and who need encouragement too!!!
I have stories to share about the Autism Spectrum/ADHD, marriage, parenting, spiritual stuff, and family dynamics. Can I just say that the ADHD/ASD alone has turned my world upside down!?! It has been a long process and it’s shaken me and changed a lot of things for our family. I am having to consider things for one child that I don’t ever have to consider for the other two. The fact that our oldest child struggles with her ASD/ADHD is a big part of why I want to both share and respect her as I write about life. Being married to a counselor has some great benefits, but being married to a counselor also means that privacy is a BIG issue and I need to be able to balance what I share with how I share it.
So, I will be writing more about our life – sharing the stories – and hopefully sharing not just the struggles (because THEY. ARE. REAL.) but also the victories. I don’t have everything figured out. I don’t have all the answers for my own problems, let alone anyone else’s. But I do know that companionship can bring great comfort. Compassion can lead to greater understanding about life’s journey, and God’s work, and crazy circumstances. And sometimes comic relief is something we ALL need!!! I want to be able to share the Grace & Glory of the life God has given me most of all…